Highlights from Bret Hart’s Book: Part 6

Up to part 6 and Bad News is once again lurking behind the corner.

[Stu Hart] asked me over and over with a huge smirk on his face, “So Vince is actually out of the closet, is he?”

In December 1987, the WWF aired a Slammys special, a parody of award shows. Among the awards given were the Jesse the Body Award, Manager of the Year, and Best Ring Apparel. Wrestlers also sang songs and so did Vince McMahon who did a song called “Stand Back”. This was not a Stevie Nicks cover but rather a middle finger to all rival wrestling promoters. It was quite campy even for the time so it’s easy to see why Stu might be confused.

Somehow News and Cuban, once the closest of friends, had now sworn to kill each other on sight.

Bad News Brown was going to come to the WWF after Bret made the suggestion, despite his issues working with him years before. The Hitman had also put in a word for the Assassin, who would have been teamed with Nikolai Volkoff and was also the best man at Bad News’ wedding. But their wives had a falling out so Bad News chased him out of the building with a pipe when he found out his former friend was in the building. Vince McMahon fired the Assassin because he had bigger plans for Bad News.

Jacques [Rougeau] wrongly assumed The Bulldogs had done it, and told [Curt] Hennig that if they did it one more time he would take it up with Vince.

Both Hennig and the Dynamite Kid loved to play pranks (ribs) on their co-workers even if some of them seem needless and mean-spirited. In this case, someone (newcomer Hennig) had attached a bunch of heavy locks to Jacques’ bag. The future “Mountie” didn’t profess to be a tough guy, but many were sick of Dynamite and his bullying. So when Jacques knocked out Dynamite’s teeth with a loaded punch, others saw it an as asshole getting his comeuppance. The Bulldogs eventually left the WWF after the 1988 Survivor Series.

On the final night of the tour Warlord slept on a couch in the lobby because he was terrified that he would miss his wake-up call for the flight back to America

The Warlord was having a hard time on the Fall 1988 European tour because there weren’t any gyms and he felt like he was shrinking since he couldn’t work out. In a scene right out of Seinfeld, the Power of Pain decided to sleep in the lobby to make sure he made the flight back to the United States. No word on if he may have offended the “wake up guy” at the hotel.

I’ll never forget Greg Valentine joking that just looking at it made him want to fuck me.

Valentine isn’t gay (I presume), but you can be the judge on the photo:

I knew Flair liked me, because Bobby Heenan had brought him into the WWF dressing room earlier in the year just to meet me,

By late 1989, Bret was pissed because the Hart Foundation was floundering and his singles push was nonexistent. The Hitman didn’t have enough money to fly home to Calgary during rare time off. In talking to his buddy Brian Pillman, he got Ric Flair’s phone number since he had all the stroke in WCW at the time. Or he thought he did: Flair offered Bret a contract at $200,000 despite having no authority to do so. When those in charge (Jim Herd and Jim Barnett) made an offer, it was for 20-25% less money which didn’t interest the Hitman enough to make the jump. It gave Bret the idea that WCW was very dysfunctional, which is something he would keep in mind later on.

Next time: We enter the psyche of Hulk Hogan as the 90s begin and he prepares to face the Ultimate Warrior, the Hitman puts Ric Flair in his cross-hairs again, and an explanation of why the British Bulldogs had such a bitter falling out.

 

 

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